what we have here ...

... is a critical motivation failure.

I don't know what happened. Monday I worked out a snarl in Summerdown, made good and interesting progress on Cormorant Child . . . Tuesday I woke up with nothing.

No words, no ideas, no interest.

Zip, zilch, zero, and nada.

My current best theory is that this is the meat-puppet's fault, what with the hormones and PMS and everything, but unfortunately this is one of those things where self-knowledge doesn't do me any damn good. I'm still sitting here with my inner two year old sobbing drearily, don't WANNA.

And I still have to turn in approximately 175,000 words on August first. Of which I have 37,445, in a draft that is not exactly what I want my editor to see. And while I have no official deadline or commitment for Cormorant Child, it would be REALLY SUPER to have something that, oh, around about September first, could be presented to my editor as an option novel.

(I also have a Bossycatzilla who is seriously about to be earmuffs.)

So this is where I have to suck it up and deal. Go through the motions and have faith, as in Barbara Hambly's Silicon Mage books, that the magic will come back.

my bank just lost major karma points

*ring*
*ring*
*ring*

Me: [having checked Caller ID, and thus knowing that this is XYZZY Bank] Hello?

[pause]

Automated Voice: Please hold the line for an important incoming call.

[pause: I fret about my bank balance and a whole horde of unlikely but not impossible disasters]

Automated Voice: Please continue to hold. I'm still trying to connect.

[pause: I continue to fret]

Automated Voice: Please continue to hold. I'm still trying to connect.

[pause: I continue to fret]

Automated Voice: Please continue to hold. I'm still trying to connect.

[pause: I continue to fret]

Automated Voice: Please continue to hold. I'm still trying to connect.

[pause: I continue to fret]

Real Person: Hello, may I speak to Sarah?

Me: Speaking.

Real Person: Hi, this is X from XYZZY Bank. How are you today?

Me: Fine.

Real Person: This is a courtesy call to let you know about our spring loan promotion.

Me: No, thank you, we're not interested.

Real Person: Oh. Well, thank you for your time and have a nice day.

Me: You, too.

*click*

Now, I have no actual problem with the Real Person in this little playlet. He was polite, and didn't give me grief about cutting him off before he got his spiel launched. (He actually sounded all of about a nervous sixteen.)

I have a SERIOUS problem with the Automated Voice because that fucker was lying to me. This was not an important call. Moreover, I am deeply and profoundly annoyed by the tactic of making me answer the phone and then wait on hold for a call I don't even want. I would be annoyed if it was somebody "important" pulling this stunt (like, oh, say the president of XYZZY Bank); for a unsolicited telemarketing call ...

I balrog.