Sunday morning in my head

So between the insomnia and the anxiety dreams (all clothing related, for some bizarre reason I wot not of), I think we can conclude that I'm stressed about something. No, don't ask me what. I DON'T KNOW. But it means that my thought processes have gotten simultaneously weirder and slower, so I can sort of watch my brain work. Like the Glass Cat's.

So, as I have been for several years now, I am thinking about getting a tattoo. I almost got one at Fourth Street, but bailed on account of the tattoo artist not seeming to understand what I wanted. But I have a birthday coming up (my thirty-fifth, which seems sort of pseudo-significant), and I'm thinking about it again. (Parenthetically, if anyone in the Madison area has recommendations about tattoo artists, please please please comment or email or something.) One of the designs I have been considering, on and off, is Dyson Cieslewisc's rabbit (the left-hand rabbit), from "Dexterity," my episode of Shadow Unit. Different reasons than Dice, but, well. And the thought crossed my mind again this morning, for reasons I can no longer reconstruct. Which is where we join the stream of consciousness in progress:

Int.
GUILDENSTERN: It is a very cool rabbit.
ROSENCRANTZ: But it's wrong. Year of the Tiger, not Year of the Rabbit.
GUILDENSTERN: Tigers are cool, too. A tiger tattoo could be pretty awesome.
ROSENCRANTZ: Wait a second. That's the Chinese Zodiac. That's cultural appropriation.
GUILDENSTERN: Shit, that's right. We'll have to--
[crackle of static]
THE RADIO: "It's the eye of the tiger / It's the thrill of the fight"
ROSENCRANTZ: [moans] Oh no, no, no, no, no.
THE RADIO: "Standing up to the challenge of our rivals"

Ext.
[Truepenny comes into the study from the kitchen]
[Mirrorthaw takes off his headphones]
TRUEPENNY: My brain is cursed.
MIRRORTHAW: Cursed?
TRUEPENNY: I have the acoustic cover of "Eye of the Tiger"* stuck in my head, and if that isn't a curse, I don't know what is.
MIRRORTHAW: Can I change the station?
TRUEPENNY: I don't know how!
[Truepenny exits back to kitchen, singing "It's the eye of the tiger / it's the thrill of the fight"]
[Mirrorthaw resumes his headphones]

Int.
GUILDENSTERN: Turn it off!
ROSENCRANTZ: Where's the off-switch?
GUILDENSTERN: There is no fucking off-switch!
ROSENCRANTZ: [shouting at ceiling] STOP IT THIS INSTANT! STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT!
THE RADIO: [triumphantly] "EYEEEEEEEEEE ... of the tiger"
[pause]
[Rosencrantz & Guildenstern look around warily]
THE RADIO: "Won't you ease on down, ease on down the road?"
ROSENCRANTZ & GUILDENSTERN: [simultaneous facepalms]

Ext.
[enter Truepenny to the study again]
[Mirrorthaw takes off his headphones and waits]
TRUEPENNY: I have proof that I was IRRETRIEVABLY WARPED by junior high school chorus.
MIRRORTHAW: [looks alarmed]
TRUEPENNY: In my head, "Eye of the Tiger" segues immutably into "Ease On Down the Road." Because we did medleys. "Eye of the Tiger," "Ease On Down the Road."
MIRRORTHAW: Are you sure I can't change the channel? Where's the remote? Everything comes with a remote these days.
TRUEPENNY: Ah, but I was made before 1980.
MIRRORTHAW: Oh god that's right. There is no remote.
TRUEPENNY: Not even one with a cord.
MIRRORTHAW: Just push-buttons.
TRUEPENNY: Maybe some dials.
MIRRORTHAW: And I don't know where they are!

Int.
ROSENCRANTZ: [timidly] The rabbit's from a netsuke. Does that mean it's no good, either?
GUILDENSTERN: Dunno. There's always the labyrinth idea. Or the octopus. Or get somebody to design a sort of catfish-dragon thing.
ROSENCRANTZ: [ponders]
GUILDENSTERN: [ponders]
THE RADIO: "It's the eye of the tiger ..."


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*Mirrothaw found it somewhere, because The Internet Is Full Of Things.

yes, no, always, never

elisem is committing art again. I have bought a pendant, "Yes, No, Always, Never," because it is absolutely an illustration for Corambis. Which is freaky, because Elise hasn't read Corambis yet.

Also, for those of you optimistically playing along at home, this means that it is suddenly much more likely that the story about Cardenio Richey, the Principia Caeli, and a serial killer in the Lower City will (a.) be written, (b.) feature the Kalliphorne and her husband, and (c.) be titled "Yes, No, Always, Never."

Jeez. I kind of have an endorphin rush off that.

Geek.Kon.09

I will be at Geek.Kon.09 next weekend (October 23-25). I'm doing three panels:

Know What? • Fri. 23 • 5 PM • Reflection E

Recent research in neuropsychology suggests that we're aware of far less than the tip of the iceberg about what's going on in our brains. Apparently decisions are made by subterranean processes milliseconds before they're handed to our conscious minds, which then conceitedly think that they've come up with them using free will. Should be some good story ideas in here. Suggested reading: How We Decide by Jonah Lehrer, Why We Believe What We Believe by Andrew Newberg, and The Science of Fear by Daniel Gardner.

One God or Many — or None? • Sat. 24 • 2 PM • Reflection E

The 21st Century has seen the rise of militant Islam, which insists that there's only 1 god, and they know him by name. At the same time, a couple of billion-plus countries have become major players on the international economic stage: India, whose dominant Hinduism posits millions of gods; and China, officially atheist but riddled with folk superstitions. Recent novels have explored future space colonization dominated by one or more of these players. What theology will we export to the stars?

Let's Build a World • Sat. 24 • 3 PM • Reflection D

Whether it’s for movies, TV, literature, or games of all kinds, creative people in SF&F have to build their worlds up from scratch. Let’s see how they do it. We'll start with some categories (tech level, economic system, climate, races, etc.), get ideas about each of them from the audience, select the best ideas in each category, then watch the panelists writhe as they try to figure out how to make them work together.

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I probably won't be around a great deal other than those panels, although I hope to check out the dealer's room. Obviously the minuscule chunk of time between the Saturday 2 PM panel and the Saturday 3 PM panel is not going to be a good time to chat, but otherwise, please feel free to come up, say hi, get things signed, etc. (Bonus points if you stay for a panel, but that's by no means required.) I'm very near-sighted and shy, but that doesn't mean I don't want to talk to you! Also, yes, I will sign as many of my books as you feel like bringing.