I'm personally of the opinion that Othering the genders -- trying to prove how different they are from each other -- is both missing the point and being unfair.

I also think it is possible to explore concepts of masculinity without making females into puppets. Maybe it's difficult to do, but it's certainly possible.

And if a filmmaker's/author's biases come out in the course of making a project, that probably just means we're seeing them in their true form.

Maybe Fincher is being honest about his problems, but maybe he's just fetishizing them. Either way, I tend to prefer he's work out his problems without projecting them all on me. That's what therapy is for, in which case I would get to charge him hourly.