National Geographic Head Games

[truepenny]

So, we recently got a subscription to National Geographic, taking the next slithery step down that long slippery slope toward turning into our own aged relatives. (The shelves of old National Geographics are de rigeur.)

Today, we get the inevitable telemarketing call: they're sending a Free World Map (trust me, you can hear the capitals) and a video--the Best of National Geographic or something like that--"which you are under no obligation to buy" yada yada.

I interrupt, and the ensuing exchange goes like this:

TRUEPENNY: No, thank you, I'd prefer not to receive that.

TELEMARKETER [sounding disappointed]: Keep in mind, you'd be in complete control of--

TRUEPENNY [crossly]: I'd still prefer not to receive that, thank you.

TELEMARKETER [sounding like she's on the verge of tears]: All right, ma'am. Thank you.

TRUEPENNY hangs up, wishing again for the good old-fashioned telephones where you could slam the thing down and get some visceral satisfaction out of it.

What fascinates me about this is the patently false assertion that I would be in "complete control" (and, yes, that really is what she said). You're sending me something I've just said I don't want, which I will then be obliged (no obligation my ass) either to buy--when we've already established I don't want it--or to send back to you. You know and I know, National Geographic, that the point here is that once you send it to me, it's easier for me to pay you (for something--everybody sing along now--I DON'T WANT) than to deal with the hassle of sending it back. You're pulling the strings to see if I'll dance, National Geographic, and I fail utterly to see how this correlates to my being in "complete control" of anything whatsofreakingever.

Another hint: if the customer is in "complete control," then "no" means "no." Jesus H. Polaroid Christ, it's no wonder we have so much trouble with the concept of consent in this country when marketing and commercials and the capitalistic mindset we're saturated with from birth tells us that "no" means "try harder."

I feel like a circus poodle protesting indignantly that I don't like jumping through hoops. Nobody's listening, and I'm a POODLE for crying out loud! Who's going to take me seriously anyway?

I shall make a tiny put-upon growl and go sulk.

Comments

Orwellian Thoughts..or Was That Animal Farm

[morgandawn.livejournal.com]

the first thing that leapt to mind - the telemarketer, who is supporting two kids and sick dog, was about to lose her job unless she found one more person to take the subscription. As soon as you hung up, small dark grey men wheeled her and her office chair away, her headset left dangling in the breeze of their wake as a warning to the others of what happens when YOU DO NOT PRODUCE.

Re: Orwellian Thoughts..or Was That Animal Farm

[truepenny.livejournal.com]

Hey, I'm a poodle.

Talk to the paw.

[king-tirian.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it makes you wish you could say to them, "And as inconceivable as it may seem, I don't want to take advantage of any offers that require my permission to inititate, so don't calling me about them." And you have a business relationship with them, so they get around the no-call lists.

I was laughing through my tears a week ago when I got a check from my power company from my portion of a refund from their sale of the local nuclear plant. Yeah, I don't understand why either. Anyway, in the attached letter, the president of the power company had to specifically point out that cashing this check does not change my relationship with the power company in any way, to differentiate it from all of the marketing ploys where endorsing a check is legally equivalent to signing some fool contract.

[valancy.livejournal.com]

Another hint: if the customer is in "complete control," then "no" means "no." Jesus H. Polaroid Christ, it's no wonder we have so much trouble with the concept of consent in this country when marketing and commercials and the capitalistic mindset we're saturated with from birth tells us that "no" means "try harder."

God, yes. I've been working on captioning this series on rape survivors, rapists, their viewpoints, and treatment, and besides making me incredibly depressed, it's pointed out to me how deeply warped our society is. What didn't help? A truck that had written on the back of it (this morning) "college girls, practice for spring break and flash me" etc. I looked and looked for a number to call to report him to, but found nothing.

:(

[truepenny.livejournal.com]

"college girls, practice for spring break and flash me"

Okay, that's sexist and sick and vulgar and creepy and ... and, well, just wrong, is what it is.

Some days I don't like our society very much.

[valancy.livejournal.com]

All that and a bag of chips. /wry bitter grin

[nestra.livejournal.com]

It's that whole sense of being forced to play a game. I don't want this service. They know I don't want the service. Yet we both have to follow the script unless I'm going to be rude and hang up in the middle of this "conversation".

Discover Card in particular pisses me off, since they force their associates to try and sell you things every time you call them for any reason at all. If I'm calling customer service, chances are I'm upset about something or having some problem. Trying to convince me I need additional life insurance is not likely to improve my mood.

[coffeeandink.livejournal.com]

Did I ever mention the time I called to report a stolen bankcard and Chase tried to sell me a savings account on the same call? Hi! I'm calling you from a police station on my cell phone. This is not a good time to try to sell me things.

[aimeempayne.livejournal.com]

When I read the book The Gift of Fear by Gavin DeBecker, he said that one of the tip offs that a person does not mean you well is their refusal to accept 'no' as an answer. In my mind, telemarketers use the same techniques to get a 'yes' as rapists and serial killers. That's just ick.

[veejane.livejournal.com]

I'm always amazed that people allow telemarketers to complete their sentences. As soon as I figure out that it's a marketing call, I warble, "No thank you I'm not interested" and hang up. No point wasting their time, and I've not said yes to anything, and end of story. They can only keep shilling to you if you're actually on the line to hear it.

Is it a sense that hanging up is impolite? (Truthfully, it's about the only circumstance under which I'd hang up on someone who isn't actively screaming obscenities at me.)

[truepenny.livejournal.com]

I had to teach myself to hang up on them--especially to hang up on them before they could respond to my "No thank you not interested"--but, yes, that is my normal M.O. (It just took the NG drone longer than it takes most telemarketers to get to the point where I could identify the fact that she was in fact trying to sell me something. And I think the fact that it was National Geographic lowered my defenses.)

And, yes, telemarketers bank on the fact that we've all been taught it's very rude to hang up on people, and very rude not to answer when someone asks you a question. That's why they so often start out with "How are you today?"

[papersky.livejournal.com]

They sometimes get me off guard too, especially when, like that, it is someone who could plausibly have reason to call me. Most people trying to sell things ask for Mme. Rysmiel, which is a clear and instant tipoff.

I was really rude to Bell a couple of weeks ago when they rang me up when I was writing to try to sell me something. Then there was the time someone rang me up, I assume to sell me something, when I was writing something that was making me cry. I picked up the phone, they asked if I was me, I warbled "Yes? (sob)" and they said they were terribly sorry to bother me and went away.

[veejane.livejournal.com]

My funniest telemarketing moment was the second time I got to tell the Boston Democratic Party machine that no, my uncle, though a lifelong Democrat, would not be volunteering during this year's election, because he was quite dead and six months buried.

My own personal proof of the "first time, it's tragedy; second time, it's farce" rule.

[liv]

I'm invariably polite to telemarketers, I can't help it, it's absolutely ingrained. (I'm polite to entirely automated messages too.) But I had one guy who was trying to sell me a telephone account, and I politely heard him out. The only time I said 'yes' was when he asked me if I had a landline in regular use, but he took that 'yes' as agreement that he should sign me up to his programme. At that point I managed to overcome my reflexes enough to interrupt him and tell him very firmly that I wasn't interested in his product, and hung up.

He called me back five minutes later to yell at me for being rude and wasting his time by listening to his spiel if I wasn't going to sign up in the end. And I really mean yell. Scary guy.

[larryhammer]

if the customer is in "complete control," then "no" means "no."

Word.

It's power games.

---L.

[vass]

Another hint: if the customer is in "complete control," then "no" means "no." Jesus H. Polaroid Christ, it's no wonder we have so much trouble with the concept of consent in this country when marketing and commercials and the capitalistic mindset we're saturated with from birth tells us that "no" means "try harder."

All the Coke machines on my campus have "You know you want it" printed on them.

And a good and dear friend of mine on my friends-list is right now posting about how some boys in her Crusades class were talking about how they were 'so over' feminism, that there's no evidence or use in studying mediaeval women, and it's 'bad scholarship' to do so, and that the article in their reading pack was written in an 'un-masculine' style (the author was a man, not that that matters) and she's berating herself for walking out instead of defending herself and her sex against the pack of them.