Day 30; plus a Q&A

[truepenny]

I'm keeping a mental list of things about this broken ankle that don't match up with broken bones in fiction. I already wrote about the sound of my ankle breaking, but here are a couple others:

1. if your crutches are adjusted properly and you're using them properly, they will not make your armpits hurt. They won't even touch your armpits. On the other hand, they will give you calluses on the heels of your palms.

2. maybe this is because of the surgery, or maybe it's because I'm a wuss, but it's been a month, and I still have no fucking stamina. Taking a bath exhausts me. I can hobble the length of the block, but then I have to lie down and pant. I'm still sleeping ridiculous amounts, and I have neither any ambition, nor the concentration to do anything about it if I did. I actually accomplished some work today (a second draft on an essay owed to a lovely person who knows who s/he is), and I'm hoping to be able to tackle The Tempering of Men (a.k.a. the sequel to A Companion to Wolves) this week, even if I can only manage it two pages at a time.

3. On the other hand, the itching? That part's true.

I am wildly grateful that I started this quilting project just before I broke my ankle, and equally wildly grateful to the kind and awesome ladies at the local quilt shop, who ironed and pin-basted it for me, because quilting around Kliban cats is pretty much the ideal activity for me right now, interspersed with playing Diablo II (again) and rereading Golden Age mysteries. I started with John Dickson Carr and have moved onto Ellery Queen.

(As a side note, I'm currently rereading The Siamese Twin Mystery, which inspired me to find wikipedia's entry on conjoined twins. I was particularly fascinated by Lakshmi Tatma, who was born in 2005 with four arms and four legs--conjoined to a parasitic headless twin (x-ray, if you're having trouble visualizing)--and was worshipped in her native village as an incarnation of the goddess Lakshmi. The surgery to separate her from her parasitic twin when she was two was successful and quite complicated (follow the links from the wikipedia article if you're interested), and she survived. I hope she's still doing well.)

And somebody commented with some questions about the Doctrine of Labyrinths, which I am happy to answer:

Q: I'd like to know more about the obligation de sang - is it a baby step toward the obligation d'ame, or something distinct?

A: The obligation de sang is cast on wizards; the obligation d'âme is cast on annemer. They have similar effects, but, no, they're not the same thing.

Q: And I'd like to know more about Cardenio - how he and Mildmay became friends, particularly, and whether my reading of him as (1) clearly in love with Mildmay and (b) asexual is correct.

A: I don't know how Mildmay met Cardenio. The friendship emerged in my head full-grown, as it were, with no backstory.

Cardenio definitely has a crush on Mildmay--"love" is a tricky word, and I hesitate to use it--and I don't know about his sexuality. He is very shy and very reserved, and he hasn't told me.

Q: My sense is that Mildmay mostly disappeared for the bulk of Corambis - that the last book, more than any of the others, was weighted heavily toward Felix, and his growth as a character - specifically, for himself and for his brother. Were you trying to get Felix to the place Mildmay already was (or at least seemed to be), where he could see his brother as a person? Or am I misreading?

A: I wouldn't say that Mildmay disappeared--he is, after all, still a narrator, and his character arc in Corambis is important--but I will say that I conceived of The Mirador as Mildmay's katabasis and Corambis as Felix's. Katabasis is the descent to the underworld and return which Joseph Campbell describes as part of the Hero's Journey--I'm not entirely sold on Campbell, but with the particular psychology of my two particular narrators, they both had to go through their own personal metaphorical hells in order to come to terms with their pasts and their damage and emerge on the other side as functional, compassionate adults. (Which is also not to say that I think either of them is "fixed" or "healed"--they still have to live with their scars, both physical and emotional, and there are going to be bad days and backsliding--but I think by the end of the series they are better, both in the sense of psychologically healthier and in the sense of being able and willing to care about each other (and by extension, other people like Kay and Corbie) than they were at the beginning.)

At least, that's what I was trying for.

So, yes, to use a semi-accurate shorthand, Mildmay "grew up" in The Mirador and therefore there was less that needed to happen to him in Corambis, in terms of his psychomachia, than there was for Felix.

Comments

[uneasy-spirit.livejournal.com]

The lack of stamina is almost certainly from the surgery. When I broke my ankle, I basically slept for six months. I woke up to eat, use the toilet, and go to the doctor/physical therapist, but that was it. Watching television was too tiring to do for long. I'm impressed you're able to concentrate well enough to read and quilt.

[saoba.livejournal.com]

Re #2- It's not just you. I spiral fractured my ankle a few years ago and healing a complicated broken bone is exhausting. Being no-weight-bearing for weeks, getting around on crutches, having to think through everyday tasks looking for 'nope, can't do this that way' just wears at you.

My orthopedic specialist, when I complained I was stupid from the pain meds and sleepy all the time, replied cheerfully that rest was good and sleep was better for healing. If he'd been just a little closer I'd have clubbed him with a crutch.

[heathwitch.livejournal.com]

I've not had time to say this before, and it's late now but: Ow, ow, and also... Ow. :-( I'm sorry to hear about your ankle, and about your exhaustion -- but yes, that is probably due to the surgery. It will pass, but you need to let it run its course, hard though that may be. Your body needs rest to heal properly, and remember it's had multiple shocks to the system (the breaking, the aftermath, the surgery, and so on) which means it needs to recover from that. I know it's difficult -- as someone who's had broken bones can attest! -- but rest is the best thing for you. Good luck, and keep us updated as and when you feel you can.

[adrian-turtle.livejournal.com]

Recovery from surgery and bone-healing require vast amounts of energy. Recovery from emotional trauma can also be exhausting. (I don't know if you have much pain, but that's tiring too.) And using unfamiliar muscles to get around is difficult for your whole body. You're not a wimp.

[alex51324.livejournal.com]

Conjoined twins are sort of fascinating, aren't they? One of the famous living sets, Lori and George Schappell, live near me; I know people who have seen them at the mall. (George was originally named Dori but prefers to be known as George--everything I've read about them uses feminine pronouns for her, so I suppose she identifies as a woman.) The Biddenden maids are another really interesting pair; I've often thought some medieval historian should write a novel about them.

[marydell.livejournal.com]

I know a couple of women who use the forearm-style crutches and they both wear fingerless leather gloves (driving or golf gloves, I forget which are fingerless). Your hands are probably already used to the crutches after 30 days but maybe they would like some gloves anyway :)

[cailleuch.livejournal.com]

Mountain biking gloves work well for both extended crutch use and wheelchair use. Good padding that saves your hands. Pearl Izumi the best.

[marydell.livejournal.com]

Biking gloves! Yeah, come to think of it one of the women is a bike fiend, so she's most likely wearing her usual bike gloves.

[oracne.livejournal.com]

Golden age mysteries...Man from U.N.C.L.E. episodes might work....

[buymeaclue.livejournal.com]

I haven't ever broken an ankle of my own (knock wood!), but my barn owner did earlier this year and the recovery was really rough...seemed much more strength-sapping than I remember my arm being. So, not just you!

[innie_darling]

Thank you!

[aerinha]

Just broke my own first bone (left forearm at wrist) on Sunday (yay horses) and, yep, exhausting! I agree w/ the comment above, a lot of it is from having to find alternate ways of doing *everything*.

Thanks for more DoL Q&A... I'm thinking it's time for a reread, since I've suddenly got all this enforced idle time :)

[kate_nepveu]

The Q&A just reminded me how much I would like to hug Cardenio and give him cookies.

[badluck97.livejournal.com]

I just had to say this.

Your series is the first I've ever owned where I'm having a difficult time going back and rereading the stories. Not because they're bad, but because I'm having trouble dealing with Old!Felix.

Which is not a bad thing, it's a complement to how well you wrote him in that I love New!Felix so much, I'm finding it difficult to go back and read how he was before...

Any of this make sense?

[jade-sabre-301.livejournal.com]

Fellow reader knows how you feel! I think if I went back and read Melusine now I would probably like/understand Felix a lot more--but on the flip side, reading how he and Mildmay used to be is still so sad. Of course, it'd probably be easier now than it would have been before Corambis came out--because now we finally know there's something resembling a happy ending, a breath of fresh air at the end of a very long, very dark (and occasionally very slimy) tunnel.

...

/backs away from the Freudian metaphor, slowly

[jade-sabre-301.livejournal.com]

having just read Corambis a month ago, can I just say that it was an immense relief and pleasure to watch Felix (and Mildmay) reach the other side of the dark abyss? Because it was a wonderful, wonderful thing, and so amazingly cathartic.

Also! I just moved to Seattle and upon visiting my local library branch for the first time I rounded a corner and there were Virtu and Mirador in hardback (!!) on the sci-fi shelves. I may have gasped and done a happy dance to know that your books are actually in a library system and accessible while my paperback copies languish with my sister, who refuses to let them go. (For good reason.)

good luck with the continued recovery--I had knee surgery earlier this year, and I'm still hobbling from time to time. It is not fun. :-(

[marici.livejournal.com]

You should try Torchlight, up on steam. It costs 5-15 dollars (5 on sale sometimes, you see) and basically operates as one-player Diablo with updated graphics.